dear diary,
i apologise. i haven’t been able to write for a while, i got
desperate lost control tried to cut myself open with a kitchen knife
just to get an idea of what is moving around inside and
i set my intestines on fire for the ultimate sacrifice.
isn't it striking, how every action is ultimately completely symmetrical.
nightfall leaves me craving the most unfathomable things,
pouring rose water over pagan faces simply to keep them in place,
crawling around in my own dirt, creeping at the feet of a sullen master.
i’ve told you once before, your highness, my princess prostitute mankind
upsets me more than anything. so bow, children of the rainbow
the judge is ready for our crucifixion
psychotic schoolgirls licking on fentanyl plasters dried up lollipops
pornographic novels standing in line like kinky toy soldiers
by the windowsill, loudly claiming an entire planet, a realm of their own
the ringleader: oh boy, it's just another one of them stagefrights
glaciated in time right neon lights a momentum made in taiwan
beautiful rows of riches, don't you see there is no war no box, a universe
ever changing i throw myself up. crashing down
repeat.
i am the rain an exploding ejaculation
crimson skies
internal bleeding heart burn stomach ache a disease that will never go away.
longing for a dismal future any future painting him dancing in the foreground i
would do anything for the saddest mind alive,
our shaved heads like lifeboats white frocks sterile scalpels minimalistic clean
cut veins bursting open like bedroom doors, LE GRAND FINALE,
inject his poison, forever yours.
and i want to download every single picture of you, dress up like a commander
in chief captain of the sea a furious shadow play waggling tail and bunny ears,
i want to cover my body in the blurry edges of your ghost, paint the walls of
the parliament in colour no #1 the slight tint of your neck
someone once told me
you always speak in riddles you are fading away i could never begin to understand
like a frozen fire a room covered in broken mirrors a black hole wishing well
put your ear to my chest listen to a thousand songs the restless chorous
i am not the one wrap your troubles in dreams
take a walk down the baseline
his brittle echo drenched in acid.